All I Really Need to Know, I Learned From my Mom

This is the speech I wrote and read at my mom's retirement party:

I have always admired my Mom – and I’ve always wanted to be like my mom. When I was a little girl, I remember setting up my cabbage patch dolls for “school”, and teaching them lessons. I wanted to be a teacher because my Mom was a teacher. I wanted to have two kids one day (one boy and one girl) because my Mom had two kids. I wanted to curl my hair and wear high heels, because my Mom curled her hair and wore high heels. And although I didn’t grow up to be a carbon copy of my mom, I came pretty close…and I learned everything I needed to know about life and motherhood from her.

Motherhood is scary because no matter what age you are, or how desperately you wanted this baby, you’re never fully trained and prepared for the responsibility that comes with a child. Bringing Nicholas home from the hospital, I had constant visions in my head of my Mom and Dad bringing Matt home from the hospital for the first time. We’re they terrified like I was? Did they want to turn around and go back to the hospital like I did? Were they prepared for the poops, attitudes, bad choices, and teenagers that all children one day become?

I’m sure my Mom had these same fears while raising us. I’m sure she had the same insecurities that I have and I’m sure she questioned some of her parenting decisions too. But she always made it look so easy and as a child I only saw perfection. I don’t ever remember the house being dirty (though she swears it often was) or her ever seeming frazzled trying to get two kids from school to soccer practice, baseball practice, cheerleading practice, and gymnastics. I don’t remember her ever struggling to balance the demands of lesson planning for school, raising two kids, and being a loving wife. But I do remember her singing me Righteous Brother’s and old sorority songs to lull me to sleep. I remember her pouring her blood, sweat, and tears in to my school projects, so that my teachers would say “her mother must be a teacher”. And I remember her teaching Matt and I that the most important thing we can do with our lives is to be educated -- a valuable lesson that she has instilled in the hundreds of thousands of students (and parents!) who’s lives she has touched in the past 30 years.

Among the life lessons that Mom taught me, here a few that really stick out, that I believe have translated in to her classroom as well:

1.) If a job is worth doing at all, it’s worth doing well – Mom taught me that whether I was using an entire can of Pledge to dust the dining room table, or if I was consistently landing on my head doing back-handsprings – I was to give it my all,and I would eventually succeed. Judging by her consistent “no fail” SOL test scores over the years, clearly she has taught her students this as well. She refuses to let anyone fall or fail.

2.)Beauty is on the inside – Mom taught me that wearing the latest Abercrombie fashions, or the newest Skechers, wouldn’t make me prettier. My frizzed out bangs, glasses and braces only made me more beautiful (ahem, no comment Matthew) – so long as I shone from the inside out. Mom has taught the most wide-reaching variety of students…every race, religion, disability, and demeanor imaginable. But she has never seen one student as a certain “type”. To her, they are all muffins. And she loves them as if they were her own.

3.)Family is the most important thing – Mom spent every waking (and sometimes sleeping) moment making sure Matt, Dad, and I were taken care of. If we were going to do something, we were going to do it as a family. It made us grow close, and stay close. To this day, we all try to see each other at least once a week. In her classroom, Mom encourages her student’s parents to be involved. She gives them weekly updates and makes sure they know just how special their child is – and how important learning as a family can be.

4.)Attitudes ARE Contagious – If you’re in a foul mood, it’s going to bring everyone around you down. Smile, and the whole world smiles with you. I know for a fact that she says this phrase to her students all the time. Heck, she still says it to us whenever any of us are cranky.

5.)Watch your Tone -- Mom taught me that “tone of voice” can make a big difference in how what you say is interpreted by another person. (Trust me – she still uses this one on my Dad.) In the 8th grade, sarcasm is a whole new world. And despite the newly developing attitudes that come with adolescence…Mom has always said she “loves the kids whose parents don’t quite like them at that age”.

6.)The Journey is Life – Mom consistently reminded me to make the most of every day. Each moment is a memory in the making. And once that moment has passed, you can’t get it back. Your journey through each chapter in your life, molds who you ultimately turn out to be. You create your own path in life…make sure it’s one you can be proud of.

Mom has touched so many lives and hearts through her teaching -- in and out of the classroom. Have you ever met another middle school teacher who’s students come back to visit them EVERY morning and EVERY afternoon…even as Juniors and Seniors? Perhaps it’s because she is so fun, loving, and all around makes you feel like the best person in the world…or perhaps it’s because they know that even though she may not be their teacher in the classroom anymore, they can still learn so much from her about life and living.

I know I do. I continue to learn from her every day. And I couldn’t be more blessed to have her as a mother, a friend, and my own personal teacher.

Thank you, Mom! Congratulations! I love you!