Night and Day

In the darkness of night, running on fumes, dragging from the lack of sleep your getting due to a teething infant that's also battling with separation anxiety, it's very easy to pity yourself. To find the negativity in all that is happening in your life. To think up excuses to spout to your boss about how you couldn't complete something required because you're so tired. To plan how you'll burst into tears at the slightest comment about under-eye circles, or disorganization. To actually burst into tears while you're contemplating these things because you're just THAT damn tired. To want to reach over and poke your spouse in his closed eyes. Even though you know he's not sleeping either...which is totally unfair considering he gets up two hours before you usually do, and he has to work a 16 hour day. But his ability to look like he's asleep is the slightest motivating factor you have to want to start jumping on the bed just so somebody else has to share in your misery of a crying, screaming, unhappy baby down the hall.

In the darkness of night, when you haven't slept, the whole world becomes your enemy.

But in the light of day, when you've had three cups of coffee, and you've shared in a multitude of morning "just because I'm happy to be awake today" smiles from your bouncing baby boy, things fall back into perspective. You still fight the urge to burst into tired tears at the sound of a sad song on the radio. But suddenly you're grateful for the spouse that laid awake, albeit with eyes closed, next to you in bed last night. Because you weren't alone. You're grateful for your babies ability to scream, because it means he has strong, powerful lungs. You're grateful for the fact that he spent 30 minutes standing in his crib, because it means he is developing properly, and will be able to walk. And you're happy about those teeth cutting through, because it means soon [hopefully], those teeth will be all the way in and he will find some comfort.

In the light of day, when you realize there is so much to be grateful for -- so much to cherish -- the whole world suddenly seems perfect.

And it truly is.


But good LORD, child -- could you please sleep through the night just once a week? Please? :)